As the days turn into nights and as seconds evolve into minutes and eventually translate to hours, the rate of my heart’s beat escalates, albeit at very slow and low notches. But surely, it is escalating.

I began to feel the anxiety, and perhaps a tinge of excitement, creeping up to my stomach, forcing butterflies to fly askew. I also began to feel the laces of stress bearing down slowly and surely as I gaze uncertainly into the days ahead.

Oh the many adjustments to be made, the sacrifices and knowing me, I do not think I can settle for anything less than the best. Or perhaps, I should change that.

All these, I felt yesterday, as I entered the lift at my house, on my way to Ibu Ros’s car, which was waiting downstairs.

It is starting.

Meanwhile, a very Happy Bornday to IJAN,

who celebrates her XX years today. 

May your life be fruitful always :P

Heard of Norma Khouri? Her book/s?

Read my review at http://truizm.blogspot.com

Excerpt from email.

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(Boss’ Email)/PROJECT/HQ/(Company)

23/06/2008 11:58 AM

Dear Colleagues

I am pleased to announce the following promotions and re-designations effective 1 July 2008. Please join me in extending our Heartiest Congratulations to them for a well-deserved promotion! Well Done!

Dr ……………….

Dr ……………….

Mr ……………….

Ms ……………….

Ms ……………….

Ms ……………….

Dr ……………….

Ms ……………….

Mr ……………….

Ms ……………….

Ms (me!), Senior (title), (department)

……………………………………………………………………………

Thank you, dear God, for the rezeki!

I think, the sexiest image you can possibly imagine, or at least it IS the sexiest, most refreshing, most touching, heart-warming image to me, is that when I open my eyes to greet yet another day, and as my eyes adjust to the darkness that still blanket the earth, I can slowly make out the silhouette and shadow of a man standing, then prostrating, and then putting his forehead to the ground and soon, would tuck his feet beneath him, and held out his hands as he whispers his prayers. Such humility and fervent obedience. All these done in the silent of the early morning, in a darkened room.

I think that’s the sexiest and most touching image that could ever be. And especially, if that man is my husband …

I’m back.

What a trip it has been. I would not describe it as holiday though – more of a ‘feeding-the-soul’ expedition, it seemed to me. Also, I would not go into details – those who have been on similar journeys would understand this – I’ll just post pictures of us there (soon).

An executive summary:-

The last visit, prior to this recent one, was about 10 years (or so) ago. I went there with many hopes, questions and dreams – as a single woman, student and a daughter.  This time, I went there with just as many (if not more) hopes, questions and dreams. This time, it’s different – I went there as a wife, mother and daughter, and perhaps a student (again?!). So much baggage, I just hope He listens!

The last time I was there, I saw Hubs. We were courting (in Singapore lah) back then, and didn’t know that we were going to the same place at almost the same time (!). This time, I went with him. This time, I completed the rites with him next to me. It’s a different feeling altogether.

To end off the rites, Hubs SHAVED his head. It has since grown. I love him either way.

The media usually portrays Middle Eastern women all cloaked in drapes of cloth – which is usually interpreted as female suppression. I tell you, after one minute being in the heat of Madinah, you’d wish you are draped likewise. The heat was so intense, so burning – but strangely, no sweat. And just as strange, the intense-ness of this heat is hardly mentioned in the media.

According to the Ustaz, the Messenger (pbuh) once mentioned: Those who can withstand the heat of Madinah, he is one of the most patient.

Of which I will always try (very, very, very hard) to be.

So many memories. One that I’ll try never to forget is the TEXTURE that I felt on my palm, as I stood next to the House, and ran my hand beneath the rich, black velvet canopy that blanketed it.